Private thoughts

Every song a different scene from a lifetime of who I used to be. The party girl who never said no or was never afraid to walk away. My private thoughts lost around the girl who used to be me. The girl who knew what she wanted and got things done, where did she go?

Remember the diva who could catch your eye from across the room? The girl who made you smile every day and made you want to rush home. Today, it is the you and I of yesterday that plays on in my mind. Every note a reminder of the times we got lost in each other in a place when it was only me that you desired.

The song like a magnet, embracing us in its gravitational pull. Lost in the crowd, it would start with a kiss. You place a hand around my hip and the other glides through my hair as you pull me in to feel me close.

We would dance until the lights came on and then made love until the sun would come up, when I was the one you ran to and not away from. I made you feel more than you had ever felt before, my love once made you feel like a king.

What happened to the woman who was once your vice, the one you would choose above all else? Our love making written like a "Dear Penthouse" letter, penned on my heart in tattoo ink. The playlist reminding me of all the ways I miss your touch.

You thought you could handle the fire raging within but one taste of disobedience and you couldn't bear the weight of my disgrace. I thank you for being a memory as I press rewind on who I was back in time.

I smile to myself and straighten my crown, lost in my own private thoughts.

Until next time,

T. McB.